the struggle with patience

I’m often not a patient person.  The Type-A, control-driven, OCD side of me takes over when I feel as though things should be happening in a certain timeline, and if they’re not I start getting irritated.  It’s something I struggle with, and something I have to remind myself to breathe through & release.

I’m highly organized (I started my Christmas gift plans in August – more on that later), and my personality only really relaxes when things are finalized & ready to go well ahead of time.  The problem arises when I have to deal with other people… especially considering the creative fields in which I work.  For example – I have a photoshoot scheduled for Sunday… I have spoken at length with my client, I know exactly where we’re going to go & what we’re going to shoot.  But she wants a makeup artist, and I have been trying for a week now to secure someone.

Other photographers in my ‘circle’ that I’ve asked for referrals have been slow to answer (or silent altogether!), and the MUAs I’ve contacted haven’t responded.  I don’t know how people do business like this & it frustrates me.  When I get frustrated, my whole body locks up and I know… I KNOW I’m not living as I should. 

“Letting go” doesn’t come naturally for me. I’m just not hardwired like that.  I have to make a conscious effort to step back, find my center, and release the negativity.  Once I get that process going, I can almost always find ways to move forward with whatever it is that’s got me twisted.

It’s easy to wander off the path, but as we become more aware of who we are, we can see the warning signs & hopefully cut off the downward slide before it becomes too much to handle.  And with every incident we handle correctly, we take a strong step toward the person we truly want to be.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go breathe…


2 thoughts on “the struggle with patience

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